The Date That Never Was

I was in this acting class in New York City back in the days in which I was an actor. In this particular class there was a very beautiful girl. She was a professional model, but wanted to take some acting classes so that when her modeling career was over, she would have something to fall back on.

She lived right next to the subway I needed to take to get home, so every night after class we would walk together on our way to our separate apartments. This went on for months.

She was a talker and loved to talk about her boyfriend. On the night of our last class, she asked me if I could come over Saturday night and she would cook me dinner - just me. I asked about her boyfriend and she told me that they had broken up.

My first thought was that she wasn't really over her boyfriend and that she would be using me for rebound purposes. And for a twenty two year-old male, this was great news.

On the night of our dinner date, I arrived with wine and wearing my very best silk shirt. After all, this was the 1970's. Well, actually it was 1981, but things hadn't really changed yet.

We were having a great time, until her phone rang. She was on the phone for at least forty-five minutes and when she came back into the room she told me that it was her ex-boyfriend on the other line. Apparently, he had wanted to come over, but she told him that she had a dinner guest and didn't have enough food.

So the night went on for a little while longer, until there was a knock at her door. It was her ex-boyfriend and he had brought his own steak to cook. I knew then that I was in trouble, but was determined not to be the first one to leave.

Everytime she would leave the room, he would say to me that he was not going home. I took this as a challenge and decided that I would not budge from her couch.

Dinner was awkard and after dinner was worse. I was obviously the odd man out and everyone knew it. She finally asked me if I could leave and by that time I was happy to oblige her.

I saw her about three years later - on television. She was in a commercial for Tampons. True story.

A Tale Of Two Grandfathers

Unlike the youth of today, I only had two grandfathers - my mothers dad and my fathers.

My fathers parents were immigrants from Sicily. And although my grandmother spoke very good English, I could never really understand my grandfather. He knew a few words, like boy and dog, but most of the time it was a combination of Italian and broken English, which as a child made no sense to me.

As I grew into my teen years, I became self-absorbed in my own life and a grandparent that I couldn't understand was not a priority to me. When he died, I was sad, but it wasn't until I got older that I realized the opportunity that I lost never getting to know him.

My other grandfather I knew very well because he lived with us. We would always watch football together on Sunday afternoons and we both also shared a love of movies. He would go to the movies every Saturday night by himself and the next day I could hardly wait to find out which movie he saw. He loved James Bond and he hated "Easy Rider" which I remember was the last movie he ever saw.

I also remember the last time I ever saw him alive. My parents were out of town and they had hired an elderly woman to stay with us. I remember it was around three in the morning and I had woken up because I had heard a noise downstairs. When I went downstairs I saw my grandfather on a gurney being taken outside to an ambulance that was parked outside.

My grandfather saw me and started yelling (and I mean yelling) at me to "go back to bed."

Two days later, he died.

I was never upset that he yelled at me. Even then at twelve years of age I understood why. I have often wondered, though, if during his last days alone in his hospital bed if he felt bad about yelling at me. I hope he knew that I understood.

I also wonder what my Italian grandfather thought about never really knowing his grandchildren. I was too young to know if he ever made an effort, but I would bet money that he did.

Sad memories from my youth that haunt me still today.

Opinions And Behavior

I don't believe in abortion. However, I believe that abortion should stay legal. I am also for the death penalty, but if I was on a jury, I could not condemn a person to death. I also believe that I am not alone in these thoughts.

For those of you who call me a hypocrite - I say look in the mirror. We all do or say contrasting things in the course of a lifetime, but when we do, we usually become very politician like and ignore the fact that we sometimes believe one way and behave the other.

So are all people hypocrites? I don't know, but I do know that we are all human.

Rudy Ray Moore - Gone But Not Forgotten

Rudy Ray Moore died one year ago today. His death didn't make the national news in print or broadcast, but thankfully the internet was around to inform his fans.

His party albums of the 1970's were funnier and dirtier than the much tamer Richard Pryor and Redd Foxx. Moore was a true original who never changed his style to accommodate television or Hollywood. And because of that, he became an underground cult figure instead of the superstar that he could have been.

His movie "Dolemite" was mentioned in the New York Times as "the Citizen Kane of kung fu pimping movies," and his rhyming routines of the 1970's earned him the title "The Godfather of Rap."

His originality and his conviction to stay true to himself should always serve has an inspiration to any writer or performer.

Words Of Humor, Words Of Hurt

With the invention of "caller id" and the extinction of the pay phone, it looks like the art of the prank phone call has joined the ranks of the "remember when" group.

Making prank phone calls was a happy part of my youth. I wasn't very good at it, but a kid in our neighborhood was. At age twelve, his voice had already changed, so when he called some unsuspecting poor soul under the identity of a radio show giving away a color television, we not only laughed at that moment, but were also entertained every time the subject came up.

I used to like to go to the phone book and pick out a name at random and then call that person and act like I was a long lost friend. The conversation usually ended with me hanging up to cover up the fact that I was about ready to laugh.

My brother liked to call the pizza restaurants and ask them for a list of toppings and then order a pizza with a topping they didn't have - like dog food.

Like anything, though, good fun can get out of control - and when that happens, well, anything can happen.

For us boys under the age of thirteen, what started out as harmless fun would often turn into something hurtful under the pretense of trying to be funny - like the time we called up an elderly woman and told her that we were going to rob her house.

Prank phone calls are a thing of the past, but words still tend to get out of control. Then and now, people of every age say and do stupid things. Unfortunately, many people are too old to blame it on youth.

Crushed

When I was in eighth grade I had a crush on a girl that didn't know I existed. I remember I would always take the long way to certain classes so that I would pass her in the hallways. I would always look at her to try to make eye contact. On the rare occassion that she would look back at me, I would smile and she would then always look away.

A few weeks ago I was at a restaurant and this girl that I had a crush on 38 years ago just happened to be sitting in the booth across from me. I avoided eye contact with her while I was eating my meal. When it was time for me to leave, I got up and glanced at her.

Right when I looked at her, she looked at me. I smiled and she turned away. I guess somethings never change.

Plugging Websites

Everybody has a favorite website. I have three.

For me, the most useful one can be found at: http://www.oneminutewriter.blogspot.com/
If you enjoy writing and would like to get better at it, then this is the place to go. Each day there is a topic to write about and a little timer in the upper right hand corner to time yourself if you please. There are some very good writers who contribute to this and I always have fun either reading the short thoughts of others or joining in on the fun myself. For anyone who writes, this website is a must.

If you are into the personal side of history then I highly recommend http://www.lettersofnote.com/
Each day a new letter is posted - often times from a famous person from the past. I've read letters that have been written from Stan Laurel to JFK. These letters take you back in time and give the reader an insight into what some of the biggest names in history were really like.

And finally, if you like baseball or want to learn more about it, look no farther than http://www.mlb.com/
This website is the true meaning of "fun on a rainy day." You can literally spend hours on this site either playing all kinds of baseball games or reading up on your favorite player or team.

So why waste your time with all of the shallow folk on Facebook? With the three websites listed above, you now can not only grow in your knowledge, but you can have fun while you're doing it.

Star Wars

It's interesting that the day after President Obama wins the Nobel Peace Prize, the United States blast two missles into the moon.

Of course, I know that the moon mission was all done for the sake of science. Either way, I'm happy for both NASA and our president.

After Obama's surprise award, maybe other nations will now look at the United States as a country that is trying to change the way the rest of the world views us.

After all, now more than ever, we need all the nations to come together. It's the only hope this planet has in fighting off the alien invasion that is most likely to follow as a retaliation to us bombing the moon.

The Hassles Of Avoiding The Flu

Apparently, my local medical community wants me to get the flu, for they have been no help what-so-ever in my inquiries about flu shots.

It started last night when I called my local convenient care. The conversation went something like this.

ME: Hi, I was wondering where I need to go to get a flu shot.

C. CARE: We don't do that here.

ME: Can you tell me where I can go?

C. CARE: Look on our web site.

ME: You can't just tell me where I can get a flu shot?

C. CARE: It's in our brochure. You can come by and pick one up.

I didn't bother talking to this man anymore, as it was clear he didn't want to help me. So I then went to the web site, which I might add, was very confusing. I found a number to the Flu Clinic, so I called it. The conversation went like this.

ME: Hi, I need some information on where I can get a flu shot.

FLU CLINIC: Do you have a primary doctor?

ME: Yes, I do.

FLU CLINIC: Then call him.

Well, I'm no dummy. I would have called my doctor in the first place, but I remember last year he sent me to a local flu clinic, so I didn't think he needed to be bothered. Anyway, I called the office of my primary doctor. Here is how the conversation went.

ME: Hi, can I make an appointment to get a flu shot?

NURSE: No. You need to go to a flu clinic.

ME: I just called a flu clinic and they told me to call you.

NURSE: That's because everyone is out of shots. Call back next week.

I guess I have to wait. I did notice a sign at my local Walgreens for flu shots. Maybe I'll just go there. After all, they are a "drug" store.

Man And Machine

When a television or computer is on the verge of breaking down, we often smack, shake or curse it back to something we can live with. This method will often work for a while until the objects finally frustrate us into giving up.

When a human being is in the same state of disarray, we frequently do similar things, which often have the same results.

Thoughts On A Busy Life

Most people are busy. And if you ask them, they will say that they are too busy. Many people tend to over extend themselves either at work, play or with various family activities or problems. Often times all of the above.

Being married adds to the confusion because your stress becomes your spouses stress, which then adds more stress to the stress that both of you already have.

You find yourself dreaming of time alone or just a night out with your spouse to get away from all of the high maintenance people or problems or obligations that dominate your life. On the rare occasion that you are alone or with your spouse, you find yourself thinking or talking about all of the high maintenance people or problems or obligations that dominate your life.

More rare than that is the hour or two where there is peace, which is always interrupted by high maintenance people, problems or obligations.

There is a solution to all of this. This solution takes courage, guts and a commitment that every busy person must make to find tranquility. And that is simply saying "no" without a guilty conscience. And the only way to do that is to not be afraid to be selfish every once in a while.

Now, if I could just practice what I preach.

No Olympics - No Surprise

I happened to be in Chicago this past weekend when the 2016 Olympic site was awarded to Rio de Janeiro. With Chicago in the running, the atmosphere was filled with enthusiasm and anticipation. The news media had certainly helped in building up the excitment.

Although, not the top story for the last six months, Chicago and its chance of getting the Olympic bid was certainly in the news enough to believe that it was a strong possibility.

That morning, though, on my hotel televison, one of the news channels that was covering the story said that Madrid and Rio de Janeiro were the favorites. I had never heard this before. Apparently the other news outlets had done a pretty good job of keeping this fact hidden from the American public.

When Rio was announced, the media filled the airwaves with stories of shock and disappointment. My shock and disappointment, though, was geared more towards the media as it became more and more apparant to me that this false sense of anticipation was created by the media themselves.

If one news outlet knew that the favorites were Madrid and Rio de Janeiro, you can bet good money that the other outlets knew this also. But, then again, that would not have made for a very good story.

A Rocky Foundation

Hatred, laziness, prejudice and selfishness are four words that are born out of ignorance and greed - two things which sadly seem to have shaped the world that we live in.

We are living in a time where political leaders are not trusted and overpaid entertainers and athletes are put on pedestals. The technical advancements of computers and games are making exercise for children a chore instead of a natural thing and the older generation is split between progress and refusing to adapt.

Maybe it's time to not worry about the big picture and put our focus on ourselves and families, because I have this feeling that the world as we know it, is only going to get more convulted.

My School

I went to Lincoln Grade School, Edison Jr. High, Champaign Central High School and Parkland College. All of those schools contributed to me learning social and academic skills. They didn't prepare me for the real world, though. I had to go to a different school for that.

That learning institute was called The School of Hard Knocks. The only requirement that you need to succeed in this school is the willinginess to laugh, love, dream, get angry, hurt and cry.

It's the only school I know of where failure and disappointment can lead to more knowledge. I recommend this school. It's not easy, but it will help you prepare for the erratic behavior of life.